So I thought tonight would be a good time to go through my mailbag and answer a few questions from my fans.  There's more of these than I could ever get through, so if I don't answer yours, don't worry too much.  It probably just means it was dumb or boring.

Suzy Jagsfan asks:  What football player was your hero when you were young, before you made the pros?

Well, Suzy, the answer is me.  I used to watch pro football with my dad and I was better than all those guys.  Still am.

Stanker Weelad asks:  I want to be just like you when I grow up.  What can I do now (I'm 8 years old) so that someday I can be as good as you?

Hey, Stanker.  First, I'm not even 8 yet, so basically you're too late and you're probably terrible.  Second, even if it wasn't too late, the fact that you're probably terrible would've held you back.  If you want to be more like me, be better.  Because I'm better than you.

Cal Rypien asks: Who's your favorite baseball player?

I don't play baseball.  It's boring and dumb.  I heard about this one guy, though.  Kobe Bryant.  YEAH!  I'm probably better than he is, though.  Like, by a lot.

G Nobutts asks:  Where's the flamingo?

Not my problem.  Find it.  Make yourself useful for a change.  You can find pants but not a flamingo?  Seriously?  Wow.  You're lame.

Picky Eater asks:  What's the best snack after a big game?

Well, Picky, I like greenies.  They're good for you, I understand that they now contain Vitamin R, and all you have to do to get them is run around in circles a few times until the dumb people toss a few your way.

Lanky G asks:  What's the dumbest question you've gotten in response to your blog?

Lanky G asks:  What's the dumbest question you've gotten in response to your blog?

 Like 25 people ask:  Why are you so brangy?

Why indeed?!

Brangy Cacophony asks:  What's your favorite band??  I love you!!

Hey Brangy, my favorite band is Pink Floyd.  I love Pink Floyd.  I don't love you.

J. Pinkman asks:  Where's the meth?

And that's all for this week!  Send in more questions and I'll answer them as time permits!

So... this happened... http://live.washingtonpost.com/grammar-geekery-with-bill-walsh-20141111.html#Sylvie

I'm sure it's no big surprise to anyone that my fans would be on various chats asking about me, and let's be real, it's not like the subject matter of the discussion was even remotely interesting.  Still, though... why so brangy?  That's what they asked?

I mean, I have a lot to say.  And I'm very important.  So obviously I'm gonna be brangy.  I had a great conversation with dad tonight.  We went back and forth a lot.  I feel like I saw where he was coming from... and I also think he saw my point, as well.  As usual, mom just sat on her chair looking dumb.  At any given time, one of those two is doing something stupid.  At least.  It's amazing I've come so far.

I did manage to chew one of those things off my paw today, so that was kinda cool.  I thought about taking a picture of it afterward to upload to the blog, but instead, I think I ate it.  It seemed like a reasonable thing to do.

I sure could go for some Wellness right now.  Maybe I'll wake mom up.  She just lies in bed for hours sometime, vegetating, wasting her life away, so I feel like the least I can do is nudge her, have her get up for a while and see the world.

So that seems like a good question for my comments -- and don't worry -- I read them all!  Why do YOU think I'm so brangy?

Good night for now!

Sorry I haven't been around too much recently.  I've been doing a lot of research on these things my mom got me.  Oh, and I also had a football game in London, but I didn't let that take up too much of my time.  The rest of my team was busy losing, so I just went about my business.

Anyway, when I said they were on my fingertips, that was kind of unclear.  Actually, they attached to my nails.  Seems like some kind of adhesive or something.  They don't come off with your standard nail-chewing.

Anyway, I come from a family of searchers or whatever (apparently, both of my parents do it for a living -- go figure!), so I thought I could use the Internet to help.

I found this:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3amCM8_JeMY

I think that MIGHT be what I have, but I'm not entirely sure.  It says, "easy on, easy off" and I can assure you that these aren't "easy off".

Another possibility is that the name of the company has something to do with "newt".  They keep saying that and looking over at me, so I think it must be related.  Newt Nails or something.

I was going to ask them yesterday, but they spent most of the evening playing with little building-block toys and watching TV.  They had one of their silly parties with cupcakes and stuff.  I usually just get Wellness.  Sometimes I try to get treats, but eating them makes me dizzy.  There must be some kind of drug in there or something.

Anyway, go Jags or whatever!

Whoa!  Weird day... really weird day.  So like I said this morning, I could tell something odd was going on but I wasn't sure what.

Get this.

Mom and dad come home a little early from work today... nothin' crazy, till she grabs me and tosses me in the bathroom!  Then they locked me up and dragged me out to the doctor!!!  At this point, I'm hiding under the blanket, 'cause this is much weirder than I'd expected.  At the doctor, some nurse takes me and manhandles me and glues some crazy stuff on my fingertips.  Seriously.  Glues stuff on my fingers.

Speaking of which, sorry it's so late with my writing tonight, but my typing is pretty slow because SOMEONE GLUED SOME CRAZY STUFF ON MY FINGERTIPS!

I tried to chew it off, but mom kept yelling at me.  Has anyone else had anything like this?  Leave a comment if you have.  I'm thinking it's some kind of weird hazing ritual, but then, who gets hazed by their parents?

Oh well... hopefully the team doesn't notice on Sunday.

Something weird is going on... mom's been acting all strange since last night.  Not sure what's up, but I can tell you I don't like it.  I got so nervous last night that I woke up in the middle of the night and threw up!  Anyway, whatever it is, I'm ready for it.  High-alert mode for this brang!

So yesterday was a pretty crazy day.  For starters, mom and dad got home a lot earlier than I was expecting, so I wasn't really ready for them.  I had a lot of stuff going on, but they didn't stay long, so no biggie.

I had a game at 1 against the Bengals.  We definitely would win a lot more if not for the other players on my team.  They screw up a lot and I have to cover for them, but I don't feel like it, so we lose.  It's really dumb.  And daddy keeps berating me about how I should be at the game the whole time and not hanging out at home.  He doesn't understand football at all, but he likes to look like he knows what he's talking about.  Anyway, sometimes I wonder if I'm just too good for the NFL.  It seems like a waste of my skills to be there watching everyone else bumble around.

Of course, last night was Furton's "biggest night of the year" or whatever.  Furriest Girl 2014.  They begged me to participate, of course, but I didn't.  It's all just so lame.  I still tried to help a little by wandering around on the stage throughout the competition.  It seemed like every time I came on stage, I could see the competitors getting visibly nervous.  I guess it was because they knew they only had a chance because I didn't care enough to enter.  Mom won, which was whatever.  She was all "I'm soooo important" and "Look at me!!!" and stuff all night, which I guess is okay.  Everyone deserves a moment now and then.  Well, most everyone.  If they ever have a Lamest Dad competition, then someone else I know might get his chance to shine.

Well, I've finished like four packs of leftover Halloween malted milk balls while I was writing this and I'm running out of things to say.  Pie and Good Wife party tonight, so I'll probably stare at the wall.  Waaaaaay more interesting.

Quiet night tonight.  Mommy and daddy are out giving out candy somewhere or other, so I'm alone.  Sometimes I leave a little surprise for them to find when they return.  Maybe I will tonight, but I wouldn't want to spoil it!!!

Welcome to my new blog!  I know this is probably much more exciting for everyone else than it is for me.  After all, it's not every day that you get to learn the thoughts of someone as important as I am!

Today is Friday, October 31, 2014, so I guess I'll wish everyone a Happy Halloween.  Halloween is a dumb holiday, because sometimes people dress up not like me.  One year, my mom dressed up like me and it was the best costume.  She was actually pretty!!  Anyway, enough about her, though...

I have a lot of activities scheduled for today.  I thought I might find some malt.  It's my favorite.  Sometimes I have to hide the boxes from mommy and daddy so they don't eat it all.  They always look really confused when they can't find their candy, but they're pretty much confused all the time anyway, so they forget soon and start watching mindless drivel on TV.

After my snack, I'll either sit on the ottoman or bake.  I wish the ottoman was in front of the window, then I could multi-task.  It's a real hassle to move back and forth all day.  Lots of times, things at my home aren't really organized in the manner that I would like.  Like there was this time that mommy used to leave her Wii on the TV stand and I thought it would be better on the floor.  I put it there and daddy got really mad.  He was so mad he took the Wii away for several weeks so I couldn't play with it.  When he brought it back, he hid it in a drawer instead of putting it back on the TV stand.  As if I couldn't find it there.  Haha.

Well, I'd better be going for now.  It's almost baking time (clouds, go away!) and mommy and daddy will probably be home soon.  Stay tuned for updates on my life -- I would try to post whenever I do something interesting, but that might be too much.  Feel free to leave any questions in the comments!


                                                                                         Love,